Psychology and me 

Those of you who follow me via from hell to  eternity,  know most of this already,  I started my blog in Jan 2015 as a method of recognising my anxieties, and avoiding the impending black dog, depression.

The initial steps I took were to read the chimp paradox by Dr Stephen Peters and follow the brilliant Emma Triplett who’s book Stepping out of the clouds I’m still reading. Between the 2 I released the old positive me however as a result I became curious about psychology and sociology. 

Sociology opened my mind to realms of the bourgeoisie, petit-bourgeoisie,prolateriat and lumpen-proletariat and the benefits and pit falls of many of my social attitudes. 
Both Emma and the chimp paradox opened my mind to the power of a positive mind. I cannot explain how powerful a positive statement is, something as simple as “I can” or “I will” as opposed to the more negative statements and excuses I could come up with. 

As I blogged Emma pointed out that my face was changing, I was smiling more, which I always used too. 

I learned strategies to deal with things, and how to quiet my chimp,  without arm wrestling him. 

But all this peaked my interest if I could do this for myself, could I actually do it as a career and with some of my other experiences I believe I can if I learn the way. 

Wading thru treacle 

Some things I’ve read lately remind me of one if the things I’ve learnt from “the chimp paradox!” 

Don’t  “wade thru treacle!” You mean well but taking on other people’s problems is a key for depression, according to what I read. Especially if you aren’t able to bring the problem to a close. 

“You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make it drink.” Comes to mind.  If they aren’t ready to respond they will not drink. But equally you need to drink to. 

Imagination never dies 

Ok, if like me, a 45 year old male your a fan if Doctor Who, star wars or star trek there’s your proof that imagination never died. 

IT challenges childhood, and offer the fact that adults loose imagination and belief but do we? 

As we become parents we are the ones who create an image in our child’s mind Santa, the Easter bunny or tooth fairy, the doctor, Darth Vader or Capn James t Kirk. Without imagination these things would not thrive in every generation. 

Imagination is our greatest ally and our enemy for all that we imagine to our mind is reality. 

With the help of Freud 

I have relayed this before but I shall once again for new reasons. 

For some years I’ve had a walking dream in which I am walking along a corridor, with glass on my left and a wall on my right. A shadowy figure ahead of me lights his lightsaber, responding likewise I rush to confront the figure, but as I am about to identify my for I waken. 

From curiosity of interpreting this I have begun reading Sigmund Freud’s interpretation of dreams in which he relates that a dream always relates to a previous days events also that the dream draws on influences in the dreamers own realm. 

So I must deduce the obvious reference to star wars as to my fandom of Star wars and the analogy of the corridor to a mash up of scenes presented in the EMPIRE STRIKES BACK. 

So as it stands I ask myself 

  1. Am I Sith or Jedi 
  2. I wonder are both characters myself 

I think the relevance of being Sith or Jedi being my will of my intellect  (jedi) to overcome my emotions (sith) and therefore myself confronting myself. There for my assumption that I must confront myself or maybe trust my instincts, more. 

I have this dream since my teenage years and I am now 45, any other input with interpreting this would be gratefully received. 

And I shall add any further summisory notes as I learn 

The goggle box 

In reading Emma Tripplet’s new book Stepping out of the clouds I realise I’ve unconsciously cut down my time in front of the TV.  

OK it wakes me up, but within minutes I’m out of bed, making my coffee, and getting the dog’s dinner check social media and other apps, then out with Stella. 

15 to 20 minutes and I’m back home making our pack ups, then unless I’m aware of my working day, I’ll see lou off, have my breakfast. 

This is however where the change comes the old me would have turned on the TV probably Good morning Britain and then if I’m still home Jeremy kyle. 

The new me however Reads, or studies.

I’m. Slowly starting to do a little more housework and generally doing more so Emma is right, but it’s only in reading that chapter that made me realise that I’ve subconsciously halved my time in front of the TV 

Because of the nature of my job,effectively sat concentrating on the road ahead, I do listen to the radio, in tge morning normally bbc radio 2 and Chris Evans followed by Ken Bruce then over to bbc radio 4 for a little news,and even the archers and the afternoon drama, however this is (in my opinion) a positive thing because I’m using my imagination. 

What do the characters in the archers look like, or in the afternoon drama. 

OK I do have my unmissable NCIS being one of them. But I’d rather be walking the dog or chatting to Lou or reading (factual not fiction) 

In writing this I also realise that I’m getting more and more positive,  and what I can do rather than what I cannot. 

Computer run human 

OK I quote the chimp paradox a lot and I’m a fan. 

I was reading a chapter of Emma Triplett stepping out of the clouds 

When I remembered an exercise that shows how fast your brain operates at a subconscious level. 

Next time your driving (safely mind) think thru everything you do,  

  1. I’m coming to a junction 
  2. Slow down 
  3. Indicate 
  4. Check left 
  5. Check right 
  6. It’s clear

I have done this as a real exercise for a training program and it’s amazing to realise your brain has done the  6 steps I’ve just detailed in less than a second. 

It works with anything you do second nature,  you don’t even think, you just do it, the sub routines (to use computer language) are embedded in your brains subconscious memory. 

Ascribed or achieved 

According to sociologists we have 2 main statuses, 

  • Ascribed 
  • Achieved 

Ascribed status are such things as being a brummy or an essex boy, a teenager amongst other things.

 Where an achieved status is something you’ve worked for such as being an accountant, a driver especially an hgv driver. 

Well this has made me wonder about my statuses.

I’m a father, a driver, an essex boy; but not the archetypal stereotype that TOWIE has helped create. I’m a partner, a colcehestrian, I’m English and British. 

Most of these I would describe as Ascribed status, and I suppose I could change some of them by moving areas or even country. However once you’ve achieved something you can’t change it.